Traveling with Children

My family is blessed to be able to travel. Each of my kids, the youngest being only 1, have flown dozens of times. In those trips, I have learned by trial and error how to successfully travel with kids of all ages. Hopefully, this post will save you some of my errors! I will break it down in stages of travel, and then tips based on the ages of your kids.

Preparing for Traveling

Being properly prepared, is the #1 thing you can do to ensure a (semi) stress free trip. If you have not traveled with babies/kids, or if you need a reminder, hear this.. your kids will not sleep as well as they do at home. They may have more behaviours and attitude, due to being overwhelmed/overstimulated and tired. It may be hectic and crazy. It will all be okay. Once you accept that it may be different than what your expecting, once you have more realistic expectations, it makes it SO much easier to go with the flow and accept the vacation as it is. I have found that makes a huge difference for my husband and I. We prepare ourself to be tired, to be a bit overwhelmed, and to soak up so many new fun adventures.

Write it Out

My name is Kayla, and I am a type-A organized person. I used to love going to Target before each school season and pick out new pens, clean crisp papers and binders, and locker accessories. In college, I preferred to write out my notes from lectures as opposed to typing them. I still love writing everything out. Calendars, shopping lists, etc. It kills my husband 😂

The week or two before a big trip, I begin writing out our packing list. I break my list down into categories; gear, clothing, toiletries, kids entertainment, diaper bag/purse, etc. Then as I think of items throughout that week or two, I add them to the list. Packing and writing a list last minute is so stressful to me, and I usually forget something. If you think of it, write it down. Go through your day-to-day activities and see what it is you need! Sound machines, hats, stuffed animals, whatever.

Comforts

When packing for a baby, the more you can make your location feel like home, the better. Whether you are bringing a pack and play or borrowing one, bring one of their blankets. It will smell and feel like home to them. Bring any lovies, sound machines/musical bedtime items, etc. Recreate your bedtime routine as much as possible! It will help them feel comfortable even in new places.

As your kids get older, you need less and less items when you travel. Our big girls just need their favorite stuffed animal and their sound machine and they are good to go!

Getting Through Security and Boarding

Getting through security is hard enough, let alone without kids! One way to expedite this process, is to have everything packed efficiently. Have their empty water bottles in the stroller/wagon or in a side pocket of their bags if possible so you can easily grab it. Thankfully kids don’t have to take off their shoes (can you imagine?!) So they can just plop their backpacks on the belt, pull out their empty sippy cups/water bottles and be ready. With babies, I find it easiest to have everything already divided in Ziploc bags. That way, all the bottles/formulas/snacks are together, any lotions, diaper rash cream, etc is together. You can easily grab out what needs to be separated, and throw your bag in. Car seats and strollers or wagons always take longer to be inspected, so just take that extra time into consideration when planning on how early to get to the airport. Then throw everything back in your bags and be on your way!

Here are some quick easy tips of what to do before boarding a plane:

1) Have everyone go potty, check diapers, etc before boarding. Nothing sucks more than taking littles to potty in the airplane bathrooms. Trust me.

2) Fill up water bottles with water form the drinking fountains, or better yet at an airport restaurant, beforehand. Airplanes have dry recycled air, everybody gets thirsty, it can take awhile to get water from the stewardesses , and the water is usually gross. Fill them up prior and your one step ahead!

3) Talk about whether you want to pre-board and get more settled before the flight, or wait until the last minute to wrangle your kids in a confined space. Do what’s best for you and your sanity!

4) Once you get to your seats, put your immediate needs and water bottles in the pocket in front of you! If flying with a baby, I find it helpful to put a diaper, wipes, and extra onesie there for quick access. Get yourself situated with a nursing cover or lovie and take a breath! You’ve made it this far!!

5) If traveling with a newborn or tougher baby, I’ve learned it’s a good idea to pack an extra shirt for me in my purse/ diaper bag in case of blowouts, throw up, or nursing leaks. Be prepared ☺️

Keeping the Kids Happy (and quiet!)

No judgment here, but I let my kids watch shows for the flight duration. It keeps them happy, quiet, and in one place. They have their waters, snacks, and a movie or two ready to go.

If you prefer for them to not watch movies, there are plenty of fun and easy toys! Some of our favorites are these books, Melissa and Doug Water Wow! Another great option is a sticker book, coloring book, or something new and fun to explore! We like to hit up the Dollar Tree or Targets dollar spot for a few new fun surprises for the kids!

Arriving at Destination

Let your kids go a little crazy in the room. They have traveled longer than they are used to, and better they bounce or play that energy out then let it less to bickering. Set up your room, their items, toiletries, whatever you need while they go silly. Whether the flight there was good or bad, be sure to praise them for what they did right then talk about what could be improved. They have to learn how to travel, and this is the best way!

Now, go enjoy your time! You made it!! You are a pro 💪

Cathedral Builders

My mom recently sent me this, and I absolutely loved it. Read below and be encouraged. We are doing good work, even if it is not seen or recognized. Carry on moms!

“🔸Invisible Mother 🔸

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way
one of the kids will walk into the room while I’m on the phone and ask to be
taken to the store. Inside I’m thinking, ‘Can’t you see I’m on the phone?’

Obviously not; no one can see if I’m on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping
the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see
me at all. I’m invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of
hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this??

Some days I’m not a pair of hands; I’m not even a human being. I’m a clock
to ask, ‘What time is it?’ I’m a satellite guide to answer, ‘What number is
the Disney Channel?’ I’m a car to order, ‘Right around 5:30, please.’

Some days I’m a crystal ball; ‘Where’s my other sock?, Where’s my phone?,
What’s for dinner?’

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes
that studied history, music and literature -but now, they had disappeared
into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She’s going, she’s
going, she’s gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a
friend from England . She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she
was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there,
looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to
compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when she
turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, ‘I brought you
this.’ It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe . I wasn’t exactly
sure why she’d given it to me until I read her inscription: ‘With admiration
for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.’

In the days ahead I would read – no, devour – the book. And I would discover
what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could
pattern my work:

1) No one can say who built the great cathedrals – we have no record
of their names.

2) These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never
see finished.

3) They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.

4) The passion of their building was fuelled by their faith that the
eyes of God saw everything.

A story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the
cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird
on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man,
‘Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that
will be covered by
the roof. No one will ever see it’

And the workman replied, ‘Because God sees.’

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost
as if I heard God whispering to me, ‘I see you. I see the sacrifices you
make every day, even when no one around you does.

No act of kindness you’ve done, no sequin you’ve sewn on, no cupcake you’ve
baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too small for me to
notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can’t see
right now what it will become.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of
the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work
on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went
so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime
because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don’t want my son to tell the friend he’s
bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, ‘My Mom gets up at 4 in the
morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3
hours and presses all the linens for the table.’ That would mean I’d built a
monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there
is anything more to say to his friend, he’d say, ‘You’re gonna love it
there…’

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we’re
doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel,
not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the
world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.

💖 
➖Original author: Nicole Johnson”

Good Boundaries

“Boundaries”. The word to me, brings up an image of an armed soldier guarding something sacred. The image of an army of mother elephants surrounding another elephant who is laboring in birth.

It’s easy to draw boundaries on the obvious things. Not spending alone time with someone of the opposite sex that’s not your spouse. Not going out every evening and running yourself into the ground. Not letting your children watch inappropriate movies or eat crap food for every meal.

But sometimes, we draw boundaries on “good” things. For example, last weekend we were supposed to go camping. We were going to go to one of our favorite locations. A place we want to retire to, be buried or have our ashes spread at. But the week had been long, our littlest had a fever all week, and we leave on Saturday for a week-long trip. So even though it was going to be a “good” time, we needed to rest even more. So we drew boundaries and decided to stay home instead. Our big girls were a bit bummed, so we compromised on making smores in the backyard, and going to see “Toy Story 4” for the second time.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible is John 15, specificially starting at verses 4. The passage talks about attaching yourself to the tree (God) and bearing much fruit. A few months back, our pastor asked the question, what are we attaching ourselves to? Is it something “good” but that may not actually be producing life-giving fruit? Or is it the True Branch, the life-giver and creator? It stuck with me, and made me think. Are there times in my life that I need to prune something back? That I need to simplify? That isn’t the best choice?

Is there something you need to re-evaluate? Something that may be good, but not best? What do you need to draw boundaries on? What, for you, is actually life giving and restorative?

Adelyn

First Sparrow’s Birth Story

-Holding my first baby for the first time-

Does anybody else feel like the pregnancy and labor/delivery of their babies aligns up with their child’s temperment and personality? I have found that in all three cases, my pregnancies and births are so in-tune with who my kids are.

Adelyn’s birth was exactly as I needed it for my first time around. I don’t like to talk about it, really ever, but she was our rainbow baby. Due to our first loss, this pregnancy was filled with so much fear and trepidation about any pains, feelings, etc. My confidence, and my soul, was pretty rocked and delicate when I became pregnant, that multiple times… ok hundreds of times… a day, I would have to repeat “I trust you God. I trust you God.” I would say that over and over until either the pain or the fear stopped. She was incredibly healthy praise God, but I was sick every single day until she was born. Each day of those 40 weeks, I threw up. At least once. Thank God, I got pregnant between jobs, and he gave me the wisdom to tell what would have been my next job, that I just didn’t feel like it was the right thing for me. I had no reason for feeling that way, but the week after I did, I found out I was pregnant. Which happened to be Father’s Day 🙂 We decided that it was probably best that I not start another job, when the plan was for me to become a stay-at-home mom. Which worked out for the best, as I continued to be sick each day. I could usually muster up one outing a day, and then returning to the couch until my husband came home.

As her due date approached, I began having weekly appointments with my OBGYN. At the 38 week mark, my blood pressure was incredibly high. My OB asked me to come in two days later to see if it was resolved or not. Two days later, on a Friday, I enter her office and again, my blood pressure was super high. She asked me to go admit myself into the hospital across the street, where I was planning to give birth. They admitted me, checked my blood pressure, and then checked for pre-Eclampsia. The doctors there did not think I had pre-Eclampsia, but asked me to store my urine in a container and keep it cold, and return in 24 hours to have it tested. We were supposed to have dinner with some friends that night, so I told my husband, there is “no way I am bringing my pee gallon to their house. We need to reschedule.”

We got in bed around 10 that night, but I couldn’t really fall asleep until about 12 for some reason. At about 2:30, I woke up tossing and turning, and I remember feeling like maybe I needed to poop. (They teach you in birth classes that’s a sign of labor, but I was so sleep deprived I wasn’t thinking or remembering that). I stood up to go to the bathroom, when my water broke. And let me tell you, it wasn’t like a little drip. It was like Niagara Falls folks. So I rush to the bathroom and try to make sure it wasn’t just pee. But I could not stop the water. So I knew, it was go-time. I shouted out to my husband “Babe, wake up. I’m okay, but my water broke and we need to go to the hospital.” He threw off his blanket, and ran into the bathroom. For some reason, he grabbed his toothbrush. He then began running around our small two-bedroom house with his toothbrush in hand saying “ok. Ok. Ok” I looked at him calmly and said “babe, you need pants. Will you call the on-call OB and my mom and yours to tell them?” My parents were in San Diego which was about a 7 hour drive, and they said that once their friends woke up, they would head out back to AZ. The on-call OB was not mine, but a man named Dr. Eisenberg. He advised me not to shower as they need to test the water, and to not eat anything. My husband got dressed, and I grabbed a towel to roll up and put between my legs, and threw on baggy sweatpants. We drove the short mile to the hospital, into the 24 hour entrance for labor and delivery. On the drive, it rained and was cloudy. My kind of weather! By the time I got into the hospital, the towel was drenched and my pants just fell to the floor from being so wet. The nurses took one look at me, and said “yep! Your in labor.” They admitted me, and was confused as to why I was admitted earlier that day. Thankfully I was not pre-Eclamptic, I think it was just my body gearing up for labor. I was 38 weeks and 6 days at that point, so baby girl was healthy and ready to come.

I began shaking from the adrenaline, and having minor contractions. I was texting with my mom, sky’s mom, one of my best friends Cate, as well as our mentor/friend Cindy who was going to be a support person in my birth. Cindy is a labor-and delivery nurse, and provided so much Godly wisdom and support to me in my pregnancy. Cindy, Cate, my mother-in-law all showed up around the same time. As contractions began, so did my fear. Anytime I felt pain, like in my pregnancy, I became afraid and locked my body up to try and protect it I guess. Once the contractions started getting stronger, I asked for the epidural. No way was I prepared to feel or experience a natural birth with so much fear in me. P.S, getting an epidural during contractions is so tough. You have to sit still and not move, and the anesthesiologist messed up my epidural, thus going through my spine into the fluid. He had to re-do it, and once it kicked in, it was instant relief.

We spent the day playing cards, watching movies, listening to country music,and waiting for labor to progress. My sister-in-law was texting me, and was so surprised I was so verbal and alert. Again, the magic of an epidural. Meanwhile, my parents raced 90 MPH down the freeways to AZ to get there in time.

At about 2pm, they arrived to find me trying to push. I told them I was so happy they were there, and to get out 🙂 We had started around 1, but being that my epidural was wearing off, and I had no idea what I was doing, it took a llloooonnnggg time to push that baby out. Thankfully, the delivery OBGYN came in, saw me, and said “stop. You’re not pushing. Your holding your breath and hunkering down. Your burning energy.” We then tried it a different way, and made progress. But after each push, Adelyn was turn. The nurses were constantly trying to keep her in place so she was aligned properly. After 2.5 hours of pushing, Adelyn finally was born. I remember being SO tired from pushing, I could not keep my legs up. But I will never forget the sight of seeing Dr. Eisenberg holding her up to me as she screamed. It was unreal. They placed her on my chest, and as any parent can attest, no matter if its your first, second, or third child, there is no euphoria like that of holding and feeling your baby for the first time.

Family and friends poured in later that day and I just stared and stared at this little miracle. Nursing and postpartum was a whole other battle, but we got there. Looking back on her birth, it was exactly as I needed. She came early, I got to have my water break like I really wanted, I had an epidural, I got to feel the pushing, it was a rainy cold day, and I got to listen to country music! We also had nurses, doctors, and receptionists we knew, so there were plenty of friendly familiar faces.

Birth is such a miracle, and I was beyond blessed to have her. God redeemed my loss and provided me with the sweetest soul. She truly is unworldly compassionate, and such a healing balm in my life.